The heart

     I have been praying lately for God to give me a heart like His.  I had no idea what I was asking for honestly.  It has been hard to discern what He wants from me, where He wants my heart to be, but I have been stagnant in my search.  I have not have an active participle faith.  He wants us in the Word.  The Word that is fresh on the page.  It is cool to think about.  God's timing is not based on minutes or days or years or centuries.  God just.... is. To Him, His Word is just as fresh as if I were hanging out with Paul right now while he was writing his letter to the Philippians to encourage them to imitate Christ's humility.
     I can't even comprehend this, not completely anyway.  But it does give a completely different view of The Word.  Let's be in the Word because it is NEW!!! It is FRESH! Read to eat!! Let's learn to love like Him.

Reoccurring Themes...

     In high school I took a few AP classes (only the literary ones, my brain doesn't handle math or science well...).  We would all read a book of historical or artistic significance to literature, most of the time it would be books that were considered "classics".  Yet, without fail, almost every book was ridiculous and no one in their right mind could relate to it let alone understand it.  Anyway, sorry about the small rant, the whole class would discuss the book and, of course, the popular topic was "Reoccurring Themes" in the book.  I haven't thought about those long discussions in a while until lately, when I have come across some reoccurring themes in my own life.  Specifically reoccurring themes God is bringing to my attention.

     I am always asking God to reveal things to me that are a hinderance to my relationship with Him.  Although I am asking Him to "reveal" things, a few obvious things are already in my mind that I had been trying to work on.  I have been asking for this for a while, and it is so cool how hinderances change and the ways I have been trying to push them aside.  The closer I get to Him the more I see things that have been eating me up for a long time, that 6 months ago I would have never recognized as a hinderance.

     For example, lately I have been seeing my "acts of service" as a hinderance.  Sounds weird? Let me explain.  God wants us to have a servants heart, a heart completely enticed in wanting to serve HIM and no other.  So, even when I am pouring a coffee for someone with a smile on my face and words of encouragement, if it isn't for Him, He wants nothing to do with it.  Also, it has become something of a show sometimes.  I, subconsciously, am sweet and humble with the motivation that someone will notice it and think "Oh, she is such a sweet nice girl..." 

.........uh, oh....................

     Scary to think about, but its arrogance. Ouch, right?  This is hard to admit, but it is true.  God wants me to serve HIM.  He wants me to be loving to HIM.  Our society is so concentrated on self-fulfillment, and we will never be completely satisfied in ourselves.  We still crave, we still want, we are still selfish.  God is so good, He understands us, and still loves us! Crazy love...

     So, thank you Ms. Ressler and Mr. Auvdel.  Even though I saw discussing reoccurring themes in goofy books as pointless, it did teach me to be aware of it in my life! I am using what I learned in high school in real life! :) 

   

     Lord, please give me a heart for You. Teach me more everyday, so that I can love You more and therefore love on others more, because You love them just as much as You love me...